Growing up as kids, everyone had the dream of getting married and settling down with kids. Marriage has been made to seem like a fairy tale with a happy ending, as depicted by movies and love novels. After an engagement, there is always the feeling of excitement, disbelief, and happiness. With this in question, many couples forget the great task ahead of getting married and living together.
Marriage can be beautiful and fun, but couples also need to take time to know and understand each other’s religious personalities and beliefs. It’s sad to note that so many couples rush into marriage only to divorce a few months later because they want different things long term.
Below are some of the few factors to consider before making the commitment and settling down for marriage.
Factors to Consider Before Getting Married
01. Do You Want Children?
Communication is the key to the success of everything, including marriage. Before walking down the aisle and taking your vows, it’s important to ask yourself how well you know each other. The topic of kids is controversial in many couples.
It’s important to sit down and agree on whether you want kids and the number of kids you may want. This is important, as it will help avoid future disagreements and heartache. Put everything into consideration when having this talk. In case one is barren or cannot sire kids, what other options do you have?
02. Faith and Religion
Do you practice the same faith and religion? If not, how is it affecting you, and how will it affect your future? Sharing the same religion can be easy as there will be no conflict of interest, but dating someone of a different religion can be hectic. It’s hard changing your faith to be with someone.
Among the questions to be answered are the following:
- Do we believe the same things?
- Are we able to understand and appreciate opposing viewpoints?
- How do we deal with holidays, religious occasions, and rituals?
- What are our extended families going to think?
- Is either of us willing to convert?
- Will our difference in beliefs be the foundation of many future arguments?
- How would this affect potential children?
Discuss this as soon as possible before deciding to tie the knot and have kids of your own, as you will have to agree on which religion you want your kids to follow.
03. Financial Security
Money is the root of all evil; most marriages lead to a breakup and separation because of financial losses. It is important to enforce a prenup before marriage and understand and agree on the events of a disagreement that leads to marriage.
You should also pay attention to your partner’s spending habits and discuss your dreams and aspirations. What do you want to achieve?
We have all heard of partners killing each other for insurance money. It’s important to visit a marriage counsellor to advise you appropriately and a marriage court to write down what every person is contributing to the marriage and, in case of a divorce, what should be divided among each other.
It’s also important to make an agreement on what duties each partner should partake in marriage. Some husbands don’t like their wives working, yet others are okay sharing the household bills.
4. Family and Friends
While in a relationship, we often try to assume that extended families and friends have no or little impact on our lives, but the reality is that they do play a great role. Family members have a significant impact because they have become a longtime support system for us, and their perspective is crucial to us. Meddlesome relatives have broken many relationships.
Ensure that you put a boundary between yourself and your family to avoid them ruining your relationship and marriage.
Seek a Marriage Counselor
Before getting married, talk to a marriage and relationship counsellor. They will offer great advice on what to consider and expect in marriage. It is important to have guidelines in place to avoid major mistakes that cause needless emotional turmoil.