It’s not surprising we all try to look best in our real life as well as on social media. People share so many things and portrait that they have a perfect life but the reality is something else. Recently a TikTok video where a woman explains what men think that women find attractive and what women actually find attractive had gone viral with 6M views. More Info: TikTok
#1. When the way of perceiving attractiveness is different in men and women it causes miscommunications between them.
#2. A boy on TikTok had said that he was not much attracted when he was more sporty.
So the lady on TikTok had explained why he was not much attracted when he was sporty. She had said that it was because he was giving ‘ the male power fantasy’ when he was fit. It’s when they think that it’s how women want them to look other than what women actually want. And had said that it’s men who care more about looks and being sporty than women. That’s when the communication problems happen as men put more effort to look good when women actually don’t want to.
The Bored Panda had spoken with Claire the lady TikTok user about this. And when they asked her if she was surprised to see that her video is viral she had that it was not expected by her and had said about a possible reason why it went viral. She had said that at first, she had hesitated to post her video but as her followers were female she had thought that they would agree with her. Also, she had spoken about being in a bubble with people who have the same preferences. And had said how she felt when that bubble popped after the video was released.
She had said, to be honest, she had felt a bit sad as earlier she was in a bubble with people who have similar thoughts to her. And after the video, there had been many people who had felt that her knowledge and her studies actually discredited her to speak on that topic, and it had made her a bit angry. Also said that she was quite surprised as many men had written her off as she had studied gender studies. And had said that she thinks is misogyny on the internet.
#6. By using the knowledge she had about gender studies a lady explained the situation.
She had said that many had misunderstood the video, they had thought that ‘ the female gaze’ is something related to attraction and dating. She had said that actually, it is the way how women see the world. And had said that it helps to gain empathy when you let yourself see the world from someone else’s view and that many men lack empathy and understanding about how women see the world.
And for what they’ve asked if she thinks that social media has an impact on this, she had explained about the initialized male gaze. She had said that it’s when ladies find out with the sexualized and objectified version of themselves presented on social media, and also they live up to the expectations of the correct man. She said that as social media rises the need of performing is also happening in both genders. And also have to be careful how they are presented.
And when they asked whether there are any tips about presenting yourself on media, she said that we have to stop relying on things like what others want from us. She had said that she wants everyone to feel free to be what they actually are and it ends up that presenting is the best way to present oneself.
The male gaze is a concept that’s created by Laura Mulvey, a British feminist film theorist. She had said that in the cinema context men see women as an object of desire. Well, the female gaze is not the exact opposite of that. The male gaze is seen as a norm, it shows everything according to them and makes them the main character, and the female gaze shows what women feel and experience.
#13. Check the full TikTok videos.
Answer @subanimoktan Y’all really didn’t like hearing that we don’t care about your muscles ? Or that I have a gender studies minor lol
#14. There had been many comments on TikTok some had even shredded their experiences.